Giving a Maid of Honor Speech? Simple Tips You Can Use Right Now!
One of the maid of honor's most important duties — if not the most important — is to offer a speech at the reception.
This speech is a big part of the wedding, and usually takes place within the reception' s first half, before people leave. You'll no doubt have a full crowd for your speech ... so you'll want to be prepared!
While the best man's speech is equally important, he'll focus more on the groom. So it's your job to delight the bride, and give her something to remember with your speech. Sound like a tall order? There are a few tips to keep in mind when giving your maid of honor speech that practically guarantee it'll be a success — and I'm going to share them with you.
Leave Them Laughing
The best speeches are usually the funny ones ... the kind where everyone in the crowd is laughing, not just the bride. A great way to start out your speech is to tell a story or two about growing up together, and the amusing things that happened to you.
When it comes to this speech, a lot of maids like to wing it — not write anything down, and hope for the best. I think they often hope this will create a natural, spontaneous effect, but I'm not always sure that's the result. At any rate, on such a big day, it makes sense to put in the extra effort and write down a few prepared remarks.
We all know that most of us don't like to speak in front of other people. We tend to get nervous when we know we have to make a speech, and we procrastinate a little. Having a few prepared notes makes life a lot easier on that front as well.
What to Cover
This is a popular way to start a speech — it lets the audience know who you are and how you know the bride. And in my opinion, it sets the right tone for the rest of it. After that, start talking about what the bride used to tell you about the groom when they first started dating — it's easy to make a funny story out of that.
Then, if you want to get into something more substantial, start talking about how terrific the bride and groom look together. Add a spiritual comment or a meaningful piece of writing that you dedicate to the bride and groom. And of course, don't forget to give them a dash of marital advice and wish them well on their journey.
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Hello all! I was wondering if anybody can give me some advice on my toast speech? I’m the MOH in my sister’s wedding and there’s a quite a bit of an age gap (she’s 24 and I’m 13). I don’t do to well with the humor speeches, so i’m thinking more something from the heart. I’ve known the groom for about a year and he and my sister live together up the street from my parent’s house, so I see them alot, and I know the Groom semi-well, but not quite well enough to make jokes about their relationship or anything! Any advice on points to concentrate on when writing my notes and such?
I am the MOH in my best friends wedding. I’m nervous about the speech because the bride and groom should NOT be getting married!! Together for 10 years and 10 miserable years at that. I’ve never seen him appreciate her or look at her with loving eyes. They have broken up lots of times and he has cheated and left her for another girl. He came back after he was dumped I think and figured he’s not getting any better than my best friend. She is just not strong enough to take charge of her life and do what she knows is best for her. He asked and she said yes. So how do you celebrate something you totally disagree with, and I’m the MOH!
Hi Rachel,
I’m in the same situation your in. My sister is marrying a guy who so wrong for her. I can’t stand to be around him he bothers me so much. They were engaged once before and now they’re trying it again. She asked me last time to be her MOH and I’m sure she’ll ask again. I told my husband I’m going to say “no”.
He’s says I can’t do that. But the thought of me standing up on the alter with the two of them makes me sick to my stomach. My sister knows I don’t like him so maybe I could bow out easily and I’ll tell her to ask her best friend. I’ll put my share into the bridal shower and I’ll help her friends out as much as I can.
Just curious what kind of feed back you got. Any suggestions would help.
K-
YouTube is a wonderful resource for checking out real Maid of Honor speeches. I don’t know of a better way to learn in living detail what will come off well, and what you should never do.
There are lots of examples of What Not to Do (don’t try to make up your speech on the spot … don’t insult the bride or groom in any way … and don’t sob through your speech). And then there’s some really well-prepared MOHs who deliver some wonderful compliments to the couple — and deliver a speech that’s brief and sweet.
Here’s a good example of a successful MOH speech. Her angle is “cute things I learned from/about the couple.” She described the first time she met the bride-to-be, and how in love with her the groom obviously was. She did her homework and wasn’t afraid to bring up notes (don’t be!). As a result, she pleased the crowd & most of all made the couple very happy.
Here’s another great speech by a totally prepared MOH (again, she brought notes!) This is a great one to watch for MOHs who don’t know the bride or the groom that well — obviously a pretty common situation.
Couples like to emphasize how their romance was the most important ones in each others’ lives, even if they dated other people. Here, the MOH cleverly manages to convey how special the groom was to her best friend, the bride — even though the bride and the MOH were in separate parts of the country throughout the whole courtship. This is another speech the B&G are going to want to see again in their video.
My sisters wedding is june 28th and i am the MOH and.. i still dont have my speech done yet. i have no idea what to say… any pointers?
I am the maid of honor in my best friend’s wedding. We have been best friends for over 20 years and she is marrying someone she met in college down south. He is a real sweetheart but I don’t know him super well and I don’t know his family at all…. I am nervous about the wedding because that is the time when we will all meet and I am also concerned about my toast at the reception… I don’t want to make it too mushy and directly to my friend, I don’t know a lot about their dating life and I am just at a loss for words… I am afraid I will cry out of joy and not be able to speak… Any tips for meeting the family, the speech or how to stay composed?
Thanks!
Did I mention the wedding is only two weeks away?
Hi Alyssa, welcome!
On the crying thing: if you prepare and practice a speech ahead of time, you’re a little less likely to be overwhelmed by emotion. Of course, you might still cry a bit, that’s okay.
James Nardel (who wrote this article) has some great tips for your situation. For example, bring some tissue up front so you don’t end your speech with a Tammy Faye, wiping mascara off your face with your hands.
Also, here’s one of his “recipes” for a MOH speech when you know the bride well but not the groom:
1. Start with a story (funny if possible) about the bride and an important role she played in your life, or how you got to be such close friends. One story is enough.
2. Give the groom a few brief, amusing hints about the bride’s likes and dislikes — how to keep her happy over a lifetime, in other words.
3. Close by offering the couple your best wishes and maybe a timeless piece of advice for a spiritual, lasting marriage.
Hi. My Aunt is getting married in June. She asked me to be her maid of honor because we are more than aunt and niece, we are sisters. She has been an like and older sister to me in a million ways. Her and my soon to be uncle are the perfect couple and I need to know how to make my speech well enough to get through the sincere message I want to leave. Please help me!
OK SO MY OLDER SISTER IS GETTING MARRIED TO THE MOST WONDERFUL GUY IN THE WORLD AN IM HER MADE OF HONOR AND HAVE TO GIVE A SPEECH IM REALLY NERVOUS I KNOW I WANT TO SAY SOMETHING ABOUT HOW SHES ALWAYS BEENT HERE FOR ME BECAUSE IM 19 YEARS OLD AND JUST HAD A LIL BOY AND SHE WAS THERE FOR ME THE WHOLE TIME I WAS PREGNANT AND WAS IN TEH ROOM THE DAY I GAVE BIRTH SO I REALLY WANT TO MAKE THIS A SPECIAL SPEECH BUT IM SO STUCK PL SOEMONE HELP ME
ok so one of ym bridesmaids is coming in from out of state…how soon should i ask her to be here for final dress fittings and wedding rehersals and such?
hey guys soo im the maid of honor in my sisters wedding and im only 15 haha im so stuck on making this speech but i want to make it perfect and not make her regret having her little sister as her maid of honor, soo can anybody help me , please !
hey guys
i’m sancia and i have to make a speech at my cousins up coming wedding the advice that i can give you guys is just keep it short and simple making reference to the relevance of the bride and the groom don’t use anything too embarrasing if you talking about child hood memories
I am definitely in the same boat as Muriel. I am only 16 and I’m the MOH and I have to give a speech to 250+ people. Yeah fun. Plus I’m planning a bachelorette party I can’t even go to.
Although I may be the DD haha. So I think I’m going to see if my sister will help me co-write it.
Alright, I am really panicking here. My sister is getting married in a week and I just recently found out that I have to be the one to give a toast at their wedding. I am really limited in what I can say because we did not have the best relationship growing up, and we’re still not close now. (I’m really only the MOH by default because our other sister is only 11.) On top of that, my sister and her husband-to-be live something like 10 hours away, and I’ve only met him twice. It’s very difficult for me to say anything about they two of them together because I haven’t really seen them together too much, and I’ve hardly talked to her since she moved up North. Don’t get me wrong, I know they are very happy together, but I don’t have any little annecdotes to tell about them or about our childhood. Am I completely hopeless?
Jodi I am kind of in your shoes… I’m writing mine now. Just keep it short and sweet. I’m writing about how long I’ve known her and we’re really not friends and I barely know anything about the groom so… I’m looking online for tips and tidbits and kind of piecing them all together. I’m sure you’ll do fine if you either lead a prayer and/or do a comparison speech love is like a… rollercoaster… (popular speech ups and downs etc.)
Hey all, my husband did this when he was best man at a wedding, he pulled out a sheet of paper and read from it, giving tons and tons of compliments to the groom (he is the handsomest, toughest, most awesome, etc) and then said “Tony, I can’t read this last word you wrote, could you help me here? And a closing quote “to the wings of love, may the never lose a feather, but soar to the heavens above and last and last forever, to the bride and groom.
I am the maid of honor at my very close twin sisters wedding that is in two weeks. I get along okay with the hubby to be but I don’t like him all that much and I just can not think of happy romantic stories of them or anything to say! I am freaking out…….I am supposed to get up there and talk about how they are made for each other and I can think of a word! Yikes…..what do I say???
my best friend of almost 10 years is getting married w/ her boyfriend of 8 years….i dont know what to say ….im terrified of speaking in front of people and i really dont know what im going to say i need help!
I just been asked to be the best lady at my brothers wedding.
It’s both their second marrage and i did not like the bride when I first found out they were dating. Please help me make a special speech for their special day.
I’m moh at my sister’s wedding in 2008.I’ve never been, I need help with what i’m supposed to do but most of all the “Speech” and bachlorette party. What am I supposed to say, or do? I want it to be close to the best and the most memorable speech/party/wedding there could be!!
I have been asked to be the maid of honor at my sister’s wedding, and I’m really excited. However, i have no idea what to say in the toast. I am having a hard time coming up with a funny childhood story. We have tons of them im sure (were best friends) but i dont know what kind of topic would be entertaining to the crowd. Does anyone have any advice?
I’ve been asked to be the MOH at my mom’s wedding in a week.
I’ve been so busy trying to get everything else together that I completely spaced on the speech, and I have no idea what to say.
I’m only 16, so my stories about her raising me are kind of limited, so I’m kind of stuck.
Any suggestions?
Hi Hannah. It won’t make it less nerve-wracking, but it sounds like you’re the ideal person to handle this MOH speech. It would be very cute to talk about some of her early “romances” while she was waiting for her true love to come along. You know, nothing serious or threatening, but some funny anecdotes involving the paste-eating years. And, if you can remember any slam books or any quizzes or lists you did together as teens dreaming up the ideal guy (and of course, be sure to point out how the groom IS the ideal guy), people would love to hear that.
Since you know and like her fiance, it should be relatively easy for you to come up with a few ways they’re perfectly suited to each other. Funny ways are good, as long as they’re lighthearted and kind.
You’ll do a great job, don’t sweat it! You know everything you need to make a wonderful speech.
My friend has asked me to be the MOH in her wedding. I have a lot of time to prepare but i have no idea what to say. i’m really bad at giving speeches and not good with words sometimes. i want it to be perfect. we’ve known each other since kindergarden and her fiance is my friend as well….
The cutest speech I ever heard was at my cousins wedding - her sister told a story about her from when they were little… something about her being a little dorky ( which had everytone laughing) and how they ignored her when she said she was going to marry prince charming…. ended it with , “i guess you weren’t so crazy back then after all because you did find your prince charming…….” i don’t remember the whole thing word for word- but I thought the concept was very cute. good luck!