by Sher Matsen
It's a whole new day, and there's a whole new look for bridesmaids. Which amounts to a welcome change from the past years. And it's not just the bridesmaids getting a fashion facelift — brides are sporting a whole new look too.
Traditional wedding gowns and "bridal white" will always be a choice. That's just not going to disappear, and that's okay. But the choices available for the modern bride are vast — which is an invitation for those creative juices to flow, and your own personality to stand out.
The history of the bridesmaids attire is colorful. In past centuries, brides wore elaborate gowns, and bridesmaids dressed similarly (er, much like Queen Amidala and Sabe, her body double). The idea: to disguise the bride and protect her from kidnapping by evil spirits or feisty relatives. By the Victorian era, things had settled down considerably — so by then we had brides that wanted to stand out from the crowd. Enter the formal, ornate and very white wedding gown. Still, bridesmaid attire retained its bold and frilly look from the past.
Well, in this century bridesmaids have a lot more say. Not only have wedding gowns grown infinitely more couture-oriented, many brides now let their bridesmaids choose their own dress, just asking they keep to a color scheme. After all, all bridesmaids weren't created equal. When you let them choose a dress that flatters them, you have happier bridesmaids and better photos.
Plus, gowns worn by the modern bridesmaid are often functional enough for other formal events and gatherings — a much savvier alternative to the pricey gown that's worn once then buried deep in the closet, never to be seen again. We all remember wearing one of those awful creations at some point!
Also, there's no longer any fast and set rules on how many bridesmaids to have. The size of your wedding often correlates to your number of attendants, but these days, the choice is up to you. Tradition's gone out the window (a pleasing thought for many brides). You can even have more than one maid of honor. The rules to play by are your own.
The same freedom applies to your flower girl(s) and ring bearer(s) — choose more than one, have just one, have one of each. But the best age range for this very important little person's job is between 5 and 7, since younger children have a harder time staying focused. Still, if you don't mind a little chaos, then by all means choose a younger child. After all, they can be awfully funny! Older children will be thrilled to man the guestbook or usher guests to their seats.
The more bridesmaids you have, the more coordination and communication you're going to have to field. Remember: you'll have plenty of issues to deal with, ranging from dresses to nails and from hair to jewelry. So don't choose more maids than you can sanely handle. This is supposed to be a joyful time for you, and stress tends to knock the bloom off a little.
Also, forget the old theory that if you make everyone an attendant, from your first-grade best friend to that woman (Nicole? Natalie?) that sits in your pew, there'll be hard feelings. Most women have outgrown this childish thought pattern, and understand that the modern bride has tough choices to make. Sometimes a bride just has too many close friends to make them all bridesmaids. Relax! Invite your friends to the wedding, and if you want, ask them for special favors: like doing your nails or hair, depending on their talents.
The maid of honor plays an important role. She's the bride's right arm, ready to help with any wedding tasks she can. She can help pick out the wedding gown, get the invitations in order, set up the shower, help with choosing the venue, help decorate, or even help with the food. The duties that fall to the maid of honor are endless — but be sure not to overwhelm her. Your maid of honor is like the bride's personal first aid kit, ready and willing to fix anything that's broken.
Bridesmaids also play an important role by planning the shower, and especially preparing munchies, cake, or sandwiches for it. They're also there to support and help the bride whenever they can.
For the modern bride, these are happy times. Your choices are endless, and you can make your fashion statement while letting your bridesmaids make theirs. No more having to bow to tradition, unless you want to. Planning the perfect wedding's never been easier!
Sher from Estate Jewelry International have been serving customers for over 20 years, providing affordable estate jewelry, and a wealth of information on jewelry, fashion, designers, and beauty with on staff industry professionals. Please visit us at
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I am in charge of decorating flip flops for the bride and bridesmaids to wear at the wedding. I need ivory for the bride and burgandy for the bridesmaids. I have no idea how to decorate them. Any patterns or ideas?