Plan the Perfect Military Wedding
The day's finally arrived. After all these years waiting for the right one, you've finally find that special someone. Soon a marriage proposal comes your way, one that's sure to change life forever.
Finally, you've got the chance to plan the wedding you've dreamed about since childhood. And all your plans start falling in place, almost like magic — when suddenly something comes up to change the tune. Your soon-to-be spouse learns they're about to be deployed overseas.
All your hopes and dreams for happiness seem lost ... at least for now. You still long to marry — but there's so much to do, and so many unique circumstances that other couples don't face! From finding a chaplain to paying those amped-up fees involved in a rush wedding, your task list can seem even more daunting than the average bride's.
True, it's not like you're the only one to face this. Others, too, have lived the military life from day one, and were so proud to play a role that they enlisted as adults. If you're one of those who grew up in the military, shifting from base to base and city to city, you probably long for a military wedding that embodies all the traditions and pride you've cherished all your life.
Yet, as you know, there are plenty of rules and regulations when it comes to doing things military style — even for weddings. And staying within the guidelines can be overwhelming. As a bride, you need answers on how to do it — and those answers won't be found in the pages of all those bridal magazines or bridal books. But take heart!
It goes without saying: there are vast differences between a civilian and a military wedding. In the the latter case, the ceremony may take place at the base/post chapel. Your officiant will be a military chaplain. The Arch of Sabers or Swords (depending on the branch of service) is used. And you'll need to pay special attention to the special formalities involved with invitations and seating arrangements.
To help make your military wedding planning a little smoother, try these tips:
Even if the couple chooses not to have the traditional Military Wedding, insurance (unless they are having a quick, simple civil ceremony at the courthouse) will save headaches and cover the loss of deposits or money due to changes or cancellations. When you marry into the military, never-ending shifts in deployment dates — quick deployments, delayed deployments, and extended deployments — are common. It's best to plan ahead and be safe.
Take this example: The date's been set for a year out. You paid the deposits, and prepared the invitations (whew!). Then a set of orders shows up for the bride or groom that read, "Report to your duty station 19 May 2007. " Unfortunately, the wedding date was set for 25 May 2007! You now have to change everything ... and even re-order those invitations.
Unless you're working with extremely military-friendly vendors, there's a real risk of losing hefty deposits. Insurance is your best bet for safeguarding against this.
For a new bride who's marrying into the service, there's a whole new lingo to learn. For starters, you'll need to get acquainted with the formalities of the Arch ... but do the groomsmen raise Swords, or is it Sabers?
Here's your answer: Sabers are used for Air Force and Army. Swords are used for Coast Guard, Marine Corps and Navy. The National Guard and Reserve go by the same etiquette and regulations of their service branch (i.e. Army National Guard, Air National Guard, Naval Reserve, etc). Also, although most military personnel won't own a Sword or Saber, they can contact the Chaplain — who'll normally have these on hand for your use, or if not, the Commander will.
There are plenty of other terms you'll want to become familiar with and knowledgeable about, but don't worry ... as time goes on, the language will become second nature.
For tradition's sake, you're better off leaving it in. After all ... wasn't it the tradition that drew you to the idea of a full military wedding in the first place? It's best to only omit this step if the bride's the service member.
If you're not familiar with "the Swat," here's how it works: When the groomsmen assemble after the vows, the bride and groom then pass through the Arch of Saber or Swords (this symbolizes the military's welcome, and the couple's safe transition into their new life together). The couple pauses as the last two men lower their sabers or swords in front of the bride and groom. Then, the man to the right will then lightly "swat" the bride on the rear and say "Welcome to the Army" (or name the appropriate branch of service).
It's important to know the proper seating arrangements for guests — not to mention, where the bride and groom should stand, including who stands on which side. The standing arrangement is determined by whether the service member is an officer, or enlisted.
A guest list will have Commanders, other Officers within the unit, and peers. It's important to know the proper seating for all your guests ... and also for the receiving line. Everyone associated with a service member (i.e. their Commanders, Officers and peers within the unit or office) should be invited to the wedding.
When seating the groom or bride's Commander and spouse, seat them with the family of the bride or groom, whichever group they represent. Commanders are usually seated in the front row when the bride or groom's parents can't attend. Seat all other higher-ranking Officers directly behind the family of either the bride or groom.
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What i did i made my own marine invites. it was so much cheaper than ordering them. all i did was buy a wedding invitation kite at target and found the marine logo that i wanted off of the internet and just put it all together with the easy to follow steps that came with the do it yourself invitation kit. the invites turned out great and everyone loved them. best of all i made them myself And my guest had no idea that i made them my self and had looked like i just ordered them. not only was it cheap but you can add your own personal touch. it only cost me $90 for 150 invites with response cards. it saved me $300.00
good luck …
hey ladies. my wedding to mysoldier is april 26, 2008. he is in the national guard. he will be wearin his green class a’s and the color we did for my bridesmaids is a sage green and black. my dress is ivory. the groomsmen will be wearing black tuxedos with a green. it matches perfectly. we used the color of his undershirt and tried to find the closest match. it’s a perfect spring color and i mean it’s not pink like i would love but it’s still a beautiful color.! try green?
Green and soft or bright pink work real well. Blue and red also work as great colors. We are still deciding which set to go with.
Actually, it isn’t just the officer’s that are able to have the saber ceremony. NCO’s are also allowed to do so. I was in a Marine Corps wedding last year where my best friend and her husband had the arch and cake cutting with the saber/sword. It was beautiful. All you have to do is talk with the command and see about getting the swords signed out to whomever is in charge of the sword detail. It has to be an NCO…possibly a Staff NCO, but I don’t know that part for sure. Hope this helps! Good luck with your wedding! God Bless!
My Sailor and I are getting hitched and I want to have the whole Military wedding thing and I absolutely adore the idea of the sabers and swords but, I thought only Officers were allowed to use the sabers and swords at the weddings. You know, for the arch and for the cutting of the cake? I could be wrong.
Shauna
My Marine and I are getting Married and it is so hard trying to find marine wedding stuff. And I need so much help. Can you help me??
Thanx for your time
hi My name is jenny and i make military wedding invitations . I wanted to see if you can provide bride’s with my web sit in you page if you can please email me . The sit is http://www.myspace.com/militaryinvitations.
thanks so much and i love the way your helping so may bride’s .
Help, my fiance is in the Marines, his brothers are in the Navy, and Army. We wanted to do a patrotic wedding and everyone be in their dress uniforms but we need suggesting and help with the color cordination and flowers. Help us please
**HELP** My future husband is and officer (2nd Lt, possibly 1st Lt. by the wedding ) in the Army National Guard. We want to to the saber arch. here areour issues…he has served 4 year including 1 year of deployment to Iraq as an enlisted man, and he wants those that went with him to preform the line, along with my uncle (Ret. Chief Petty officer USN) and My cousin (Currently serving USN)… can we do any of this?? I know that my 2 Navy men are not athorized to wear a cutless so we were going to have them Hand slute and have our other men carry steel…I am so confused about were to look for anwsers.
Help!! My fiance and I originally wanted to get married the day after he graduated bootcamp. I had everything all set up and even though it was his day off with his family and I got to see him all weekend his commander did not allow us to get married. Now that he is a PFC in the army and going through AIT, can they still tell us we cannot get married when he comes home for exidus (xmas leave)? It’s hard to plan something knowing that, so if anyone knows anything that would help tremendously!
Thanks!
I am facing the same issue, it seems, as a few women. How hard is it to get a waiver to have the arch of sabres? My fiance is an enlisted member of the army, and he is working on becoming an NCO (and might possibly be one by the time our wedding actually happens). Our wedding is going to be rather unique, though. We’re not having it on the military base, because no one we know will be able to travel to where he is stationed, so we’re having it near his home. His father and grandfather and my step-father and grandfather were all service members, and we’re going to have members from EVERY branch in our wedding (we’re both from quite patriotic families). We’re having an outdoor wedding, and the reception will follow at the same location. We want the full military formal wedding, but we’re wrestling with how we are going to pull that off in the heat of the summer outside. We’re definitely planning on blue white and silver themes, with plenty of red incorporated into the reception. I need suggestions on how to work everything out though. It’s almost a year off and the stress is already getting to me!!
I have been reading everyone comments and I am still unsure about the sword detail. My husband and I are renewing our vows come Feb. We got married in the courthouse right out of boot camp. Now that we are having our big wedding that I have always wanted, I wanted to do some kind of Military traditions. My husband is a Sgt in the Marine Corps and he doesnt think it is ok to do the sword arch. Is it allowed? What is the Min. of men that have to be in it. As well, what rank do they all have to be? Also is there any other ideas i could so during my big day to have the military in it??
Thank You
My fiance and I are getting married next sept of 08. He just joined the national guard. He is some friends in the guards also. He wants to have him and two of his buddies where there class As in the wedding and I’m not sure what color tux I should have the other two groomsmen where that won’t look taky. And I also wanted my bridesmaids to where pink but I’m not sure if that will clash or not? What do you think I could do for colors for the groomsmen and bridesmaid that will look elegeant and not taky? Please help!!
HELLO, MY HUSBAND AND I ARE BOTH IN THE MILITARY, ARMY ACTIVE DUTY CURRENTLY DEPLOYED IN IRAQ/AFGHANISTAN. WE GOT MARRIED AT THE COURTHOUSE BEFORE GETTING DEPLOYED AND ARE PLANNING A SMALL WEDDING OR RECEPTION ONCE WE RETURN. I WAS WANTING SOME MILITARY WEDDING IDEAS SUCH AS WHETHER BOTH OF US SHOULD WEAR OUR MILITARY UNIFORM, CLASS A’S OR SHOULD HE AND THE BEST MAN SHOULD WEAR THE UNIFORM, ETC.
IF THERE IS ANYONE WHO CAN GUIDE ME IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION ON WHERE TO FIND INFO. ABOUT THIS I WOULD GREATLY APPRECIATE IT. THANKS IN ADVANCE,
SGT CAMILLE JOHNSON
Ok, I know you can have whatever colors you want for your wedding and still have your groom wear his military uniform, but I’m really big on matching. I don’t like the idea of having pink and purple dresses and flowers while my hunny and his friends are all wearing army green dress uniforms. We are having a SMALL beach wedding the first weekend of October and I’m stuck on colors. I just want it to look good with his uniform, i was thinking bronze and golds but I just don’t know. ANY SUGGESTIONS???
Okay, my fiancee is in the National Guard and is a Pv2……..and we got engaged Dec of 06 and want to plan a May of 08 and it is now July of 07. Nothing has been bought, nothing has been set in stone planned yet. But we seriously need to get on the ball with this. I need any and all information to help me along STARTING my plans on this. I don’t want 100% military wedding, but want the cake topper, the arch and right invites, etc. along with the traditional civilian wedding too. Any and ALL help, please please reply with it, it’ll be greatly appreciated.
my fiance and I are getting married next year and are having a military wedding. he is in the army reserves and is a SGT. does anyone have any advise? we’ve never been to a military wedding and haven’t found anyone yet who has had one or who has been to one. please give me some feedback on this. thanks!!!
i need help :(( im going back to iraq next week and when i get back i want to get a Military Wedding when i was little i always wanted to join the army when i was a kid and now i made my dreams come true and now its hard because i need to pick a good Military Wedding song but i cant find a good song on any website for a Military Wedding can u guys please send me a good website with Military Wedding songs
hello, i am in the army and wanting to get married by sep 1st of this year. help me out, cuz this is my first wedding…..ever. so if you could help me out that would be wild. thank. Pvt Ryan
My FH is not in the military, however, one of our groomsmen is. Should I ask that he get a tux to coordinate with the rest of the wedding party? Or should I tell him that he can wear his uniform instead?
May a warrant officer be allowed a saber ritual?? Or is it just for commosioned officers??:-?